I've made up my mind.

[xaq_the_aereon]

After what happened in Team Hatoful's last playthrough, I finally decided that my grousings and grumblings about what being Ryouta's VA had brought on had gone on long enough.

If history's going to remember me for voicing a cross-dressing rock dove, then I'M BURNING IT INTO HISTORY'S BRAIN, DAMMIT.




(Side note: That is now my sig image on all the forums I frequent.)


...I feel far more at peace with this decision than I probably should, and that's fine by me.

Comments

[kjorteo]

So you're ... coming out as the person who voices Ryouta?

[xaq.livejournal.com]

I dunno if that's really the right term, but I've noticed lately that, whenever Ryouta does something involving cross-dressing or acting...I dunno, "girly" would be the term I guess?...it just bugged me for some reason. That became especially apparent to me in the last storyline.

That bit in one of the videos where I declared I was quitting? Well, obviously I didn't, but I wasn't entirely joking about that. I don't know why it bothered me as much as it did, and the more I think about it, the more I find that I really have no reason for it to bug me. Honestly, once I could force my way past those grousings, I really got into the role...it just took a bit more work getting past them than it really should.

I've also found myself being genuinely embarrassed to bring up the fact that I enjoy this game in other communities I'm part of. The closest I ever got until now was doing a review of Hatogate for a gaming community I'm part of...and even then, I worded things to the point that you'd have no clue I had any involvement in the game's making.

So this is more a case of me telling the part of myself expressing that unwarranted aggrevation and embarrassment to be gone, and accepting my connection with Ryouta for what it is: something I genuinely enjoy.

[kjorteo]

Ah! Well, I actually wasn't aware that you had a problem, and I apologize if I should have been and I was too dense to catch on or something, but ... I'm glad that it's resolved, at any rate. :)

Sadly, I can't really say more than that because I am so the wrong person to talk to when it comes to feeling conflicted about liking girly things.

[xaq.livejournal.com]

Eh, truth be told, I don't know why the idea of playing a cross-dressing magical girl bugged me so much anyway, considering a few years back I brainstormed a story involving Xaq as a gender-bending magical girl. XP

Guess I just forgot about that until recently.

[budgiebin.livejournal.com]

Well, did it help you feel more comfortable when Ryouta said that he considers crossdressing just another kind of job? Just a line of work he happens to be skilled in?

[davidn]

I did notice that you were quite hesitant during the "taken from behind with the massive thing" section in Bad Boys Love, but I had thought that your reaction to the whole crossdressing pigeon thing was the same as my own jokingly put-upon feelings about being cast as someone who cuts birds up with a chainsaw and posts them to their friends in bits - I had no idea that you were sincere! The dream you posted about last month takes on a whole new meaning now...

I am glad that you've decided to... let yourself enjoy the whole thing - you're one of us in this mad escapade, and nobody should think any less of you for it. As you yourself said, "If we're going to do this, we might as well go balls to the wall on it." :)